These last five months have been a tender time in my family. I have attended three funerals - one in December, one in April and one in May. It has also brought my family closer together, with more occasions to show each other our love and give each other our support in these difficult, tender times.
I feel somewhat hesitant to write about these experiences because they are private, personal experiences held close to my families hearts. But, I did want to say that there have been three people in my family who have passed from this life. My cousin - Brynn Clausen, my uncle - David Walker and my grandma - Ernestine Cowley. Each person has had there own individual impact on this family and will continue to - as they are each so close to us and forever connected to us.
There is a song that I think of when I think about those I have lost. It is "Lead Kindly Light". The last verse of this song goes as follows: So long thy pow'r hath blest me, sure it still - will lead me on. O'er moor and fen, o'er crag and torrent, till - the night is gone. And with the morn those angel faces smile, which I have loved long since, and lost awhile.
I have felt the cold hand of death reach out and take those that I loved from my life and into the next. I say it this way because each time it felt cold and empty. But, I do know that there is more than I can yet see. As the scriptures say, "For now we see through a glass, darkly; but then shall I know even as also I am known." - 1Cor 13:12 "Eye hath not seen, nor ear heard, neither have entered into the heart of man, the things which God hath prepared for them that love him." - 1Cor 2:9
Beautiful Jilline. I have been listening to a lot of music lately, helps me heal, and listened to the last line of Lead kindly light and loved it too. I know our loved ones are watching over us. Sometimes I think I wished I could tell my dad this, and then the thought comes to my mind, he already knows. Thanks for this post.
ReplyDeleteI was telling Jim and Sandy how I was feeling a empty space, so it is interesting that you would feel the same. I like a poem by Carolyn Pearson:
ReplyDeletePOINT OF VIEW
Sun and mountain meet.
"Look," I say.
"Sunset!"
But I forget
That far away
An islander
Wipes morning
From his eyes
And watches
The same sun
Rise.
What's birth?
And death?
What's near
Or far?
It all depends
On where you are.